This is the muscle test that was today for Life Drawing II.

Under the cut because it's 68 terms of Latin words.

I'm writing these for my last pre-test of memorization. Looking at no papers.

( OMG too muuuch. )

I just broke up with my boyfriend in the second worst way possible. Instant Messaging.

I am officially a giant douchebag. Fuck.

Edit: Took him a whole five hours to defriend me on facebook. Sooooo mature.

This is what happens when life intervenes with school:

I have a 15 minute oral presentation for my Intro to Photography class on a photographer, explaining three pieces of their work and what critics like/dislike about them and blah blah blah. I don't think this Professor (who is a nut, by the way, and I'm not joking.) realizes how /long/ fifteen minutes is. Ten minutes is long enough, especially since our class is surely going to lose all attention on anything but the ceiling and their own drool after about five. I shouldn't even be taking this class, to be honest. It's supposably necessary for Illustration but I do not see the correlation between black and white dark room photography and drawing fantasy subjects in oil. There is no correlation. This isn't mentioning the supply list, but that's a whole other rant. So this oral presentation is on Tuesday, fifteen minutes long, and I have nothing so far. I've had zero focus on anything other than something that will completely distract my mind from real life, and I know it's probably not going to go well considering I'm generally not so hot at speaking publicly. ...So naturally I'm beginning to stress out.

I have an oil painting of my niece that should already be done, for my Illustration 2 class. It's turning out decent, I just have so much work to do on it still. It's taking far too long, and the end of the semester is the 11th of December, and I still have my final project to start for that, which will be Tracks and Raoul in oil. So there's some more stress.

I have my Life Drawing final to focus on (which I haven't started), plus a huge test on muscle anatomy this Tuesday that I haven't studied for because uhh... it's academic, and I don't really do academics well. More stress.

And last but not least my Intro to Painting class, which I was behind in but now I'm okay, I think. So that's one less thing I have to worry about.

*SIGH* This is going to be a shitty week, indeed.

Sadness. ;-;

Title: The Inevitable Truth
Series: G1
Rating: PG (I suppose? Just angst)
Pairing: Tracks/Raoul
Author's Note: Created thanks to swipeatronspark, so if you cry because of this, blame her.

It was a topic that had never arisen between the two of them… but both knew it was inevitable.

Tracks had mentioned something, off-handedly of course, about just how long his travels in space had been. How boring. How tedious. How many, many years had passed by without him batting an optic.

Raoul had fallen silent after that, and it took Tracks thirty long, agonizing seconds to realize his mistake.

Tracks called his lover’s name, softly. Apologetically.

The youth refused to meet the Autobot’s gaze, refused to speak lest his voice gave out on him, his gloved hands clenched at his sides. Tracks didn’t fail to notice the ever so slight trembling of Raoul’s frame, his thick shock of hair keeping his face hidden.

A vulnerable flash of hurt crossed the mech’s faceplates, the guilt of what he’d not meant to bring up eating him away until he couldn’t bear it anymore.

Slowly, he eased the trembling – not crying, no, men did not cry – youth into his hand, lifting him up, the only sounds the hydraulic whirrings of the Corvette’s internals.

Without a word, Tracks hesitantly nestled his nose into the crook of his lover’s neck.

A delicate, cherished hand lifted and pressed against smooth red plating.

And they were silent.

I would have to say this has been the worst week of my life. I have never broken down so many times over the course of several days. Finding my cat as he was, wet and broken and lifeless in the middle of the road was the most horrific and heartbreaking thing that I've ever been forced to endure. He'd been missing a day, and since he was an outdoor cat I wasn't too worried. He'd been gone a day before. I figured I'd just... call his name and he'd come trotting back to the door. He wasn't supposed to be an outdoor cat, I swore up and down at dad to not let him out, but it's what Jazz wanted. He loved the outdoors, and for a long time he simply sprinted back and forth through the backyard, catching bugs or the like. He looked like a snow leopard but without the spots.

He was my best friend since he was eight weeks old, and I had saved him from being starved and flea-ridden and being sold as snake food at a Reptile Expo. My parents weren't happy when I brought the fluffy little grey thing into the house (everyone knows how many animals live here already), but I assured them I would pay for all of the expenses, and I did. At first he was a little hellion, like all kittens. He'd be so cute at night and sleep tucked under my chin, and then right when I'd fall asleep he'd bite at my necklace, catching some of my skin with it. During the day he'd hide under some piece of furniture, wait for you to pass, and then latch onto your ankles. It got irritating real fast, but then he grew up and became this cuddly beast of twelve and a half pounds, with the most fluffy and soft fur you'd ever put your fingers through. I bought him a huge scratching post that he passed out on daily, and I would always go over and pick him up and cuddle him close while watching TV. He turned out to be the nicest, best pet I've ever owned. He wasn't even a year old.

I'm crying again and I can't help it. Everything reminds me of him. I try to put my mind on other things but as soon as I'm alone with my thoughts everything just comes crashing back, and it all centers around the horrifying image of him in the road and me screaming at every car that passed to not hit my cat please don't hit him again.

I have a new kitten already, but not as a replacement. No one could replace him, and I'd give my entire Transformers collection and more if I could get him back. No, I found this kitten on craigslist, his mother hit by a car after being dropped off, leaving three kittens along the highway. A very kind woman spent an hour catching them in the rain, and I went over there last night and picked him out. He's very adorable like all kittens, and he cuddles close as often as he's able. I named him Perceptor, and he's starting to grow on me. It just seemed right that I took him home, with how miserable his life started.

Sorry for the long depressing post... I just needed to get that out. <3

I just found my cat dead in the middle of the road.

I haven't stopped crying.

Edit: It's sickeningly ironic that his name is Jazz. Rest in peace, baby... I miss you so so much. <3333

( Pic under the cut. )

Give me a pairing and an emotion, and I will write you at least two paragraphs of pure and glorious and entirely shameless SMUT for it. You can toss up as many prompts as you like, but I'll only guarantee one response per requester.

Transformers only, please. Any verse 'cept Shattered Glass because I uh... don't know it that well. 8D

Just for the heck of it, my boyfriend got me an ornament for Christmas. He has embraced my obsession and gotten me an Optimus Prime talking ornament! It's just his head, but his optics light up and he says three different phrases! 83

*rolls around happeh*

I just made a canvas stretcher out of four pieces of wood. I still have all my fingers too. ^______^ *is so proud of herself for making something three-dimensional*

Sarah Palin is here in Michigan. *twitch twitch*

I wonder if she can see Russia from here.

Sorry for being as absent as I've been. D: The juicy info on my boring life is under the cut!

( It doesn't matter who's wrong or right, just beat it! Whoo! )

This was a /horrible/ time of the year to get back into Pokemon. Damn you Fire Red! In only a day's time I have an arsenal of Charmeleon (30), Pikachu (28), Pidgeotto (29), Gyrados (31), and Nidorino (28).... all with Transformers names. *facepalm*

Well, there goes my social life.

So I'm really really really strapped for cash and I need some money to pay for my school supplies (art supplies are horrendously expensive) so I'm offering up some pictures for sale. These are all hand made by me, as in I took the picture, I physically developed them (which is actually a lot more difficult than you'd think), and spotted them to ensure they look the best they can be.

Because my scanner is crap and won't scan for me at all, I took a lousy picture in photobooth to show you the pic that I'd be selling, though there are others along with Animated Grimlock, Animated Prowl, Animated Blurr, Animated Jazz, Revoltech Optimus Prime, and Revoltech Starscream that I just don't have with me right now. I can grab some pics of those as well (I'm really fond of the Revoltech pics). If you're interested in a picture for a particular toy, just drop me a line.

I'm selling this print (I can make as many as I want, really) for $8 by itself plus shipping costs. It's on glossy 8 x 10 photo paper with a white border around it. If people are interested, I will also cut and mat (and frame, too, but that's extra) for a total of $18 plus shipping.

( Damn he looks hot. )
If you're interested let me know, please! Any help is really appreciated, and I think both sides benefit from it. <3

Finished up my design...

( Tracks is definitely worth having this on my body )

It's official!

609 days 4 hours 32 minutes and 25 seconds til Transformers 3! Woohoo! 8D

Shit I miss RPing so much. I'd like to stop being so busy so I can get my head back into Transformers again. I don't want to let this fandom go. I love it too much.

I haven't drawn a Transformer in forever, I haven't drawn porn in equally as long, and it's really depressing, as sad as that sounds.

*SIGH*

I now have a boyfriend.

I've never been so happy so fast before.

He's absolutely amazing and his smile is soooo charming and adorable. I'm all fuzzy.

<333

Found a kitten on my front porch. She's kind of adorable. If I didn't have three cats already I'd keep her, as she's very, very nice and purred as soon as I caught her. She must be someone's. Hmm.

Also, thinking of selling Masterpiece Optimus so I can get one of Ramon Rodriguez' (Leo Spitz) outfits that is up for auction. Your thoughts?

Drama is fucking retarded. If you started any sort of drama, just stop! Fucking apologize, get it over with and get on with the things you actually enjoy doing in fandom, like meeting new people and enjoying the writing and art that the fandom has to offer. I've lost too many fucking friends because of shit that shouldn't have happened in the first place.

Excuse my language, but seriously. Unnecessary drama takes the enjoyment out of /ANYTHING/, and I, for one, like this fandom and don't want to leave it just because half of the population is retarded and fights over petty things like characters and pairings. We all have opinions. We all have favorites.

CUT THE SHIT AND ENJOY IT FOR WHAT IT IS DAMNIT. >: